This is such a fun and interesting scene. I think you did well with the figures and the golem's expression is pretty well captured especially the from such a challenging angle. I personally think the composition feels a bit flat and has a lot of empty space. I made it a lower angle perspective so that it feels more dramatic and also fit the ceiling stuff in without just cropping it out for a more close up composition. I made the ember heart the main focal and light source cause it feels like that's the important part of this piece's storytelling. The golem and the person holding the heart feels more important to the scene so I push the third figure back more into the background. I also added foreground and some background elements to increase the depth.
Oh wow, this is absolutely massive, I love the dynamism you have introduced to this painting, thank you for your time and feedback, I will incorporate it this image!