This is a very promising start. You just need to space the eyes more and bring them a little further down, as the head is tilting downwards. It’s a very good idea to use thick strokes on the eyes, but try to keep the thickest “value” to the center of the eye toward the outer corner. Anime eyes mostly look like an open shape, there usually is no emphasise on the inner corner. Practice various eye shapes and views without drawing the face just to get the hang of it. As for the hair, add volume to it in block shapes so it doesn’t look glued on; keep in mind that hair moves along with the posture of your character. Hope this helps. And have fun drawing'!
spacing them out helps for sure, though the mismatch might be the head tilt more than the eye shapes. maybe draw one light curve across both eyes first and sit them on that line, so the far eye gets a bit narrower. keeps the pair matching when you turn the head
Good point Priya!