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Bob the kalashtar “Black sheep”
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What can I improve?

Bob the kalashtar “Black sheep”

Im kinda just starting to turn “pro” and I know I have a lot to improve, so i think i just want to see where I am right now, please point out any mistake/likeable part, I take any kind of advice. Thank you all.

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Focus on the specific issues you can see
Use red so corrections are easy to spot
Be constructive and encouraging
Explain *why* your change improves the piece
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